May 20, 2018
Around 24 hours ago I was jumping around, shouting from the top of my lungs, praising and worshiping Christ with the greatest capacity I’ve ever had. Like last year, I once again felt this feeling inside my heart – this pain that’s so agonizing, yet so satisfying and fulfilling. Once again, the Lord has shown me what His love can really do and how He can prove us wrong and prove that our doubts are so miniscule compared to the Truth of His Word. I was truly blessed to have the privilege to serve this year’s RYC [Regional Youth Conference] in the worship band and just being able to be free and worship without any physical constraint was something I’ve never had in RYC. I’ve never outstretched my arms so wide to accept His love and to welcome Him into my life without hesitation.
Going into this service, I kept being called out by my friends for being prideful, but I didn’t know why or how because I didn’t feel like I was being prideful, but when I got up on stage, I finally understood why. By being up there, I felt as if I was only in “Music Ministry Mode” not “Worship Mode”. I became conscious of what I sounded like and if I was being heard by everyone. The first three worships I felt nothing… I felt as if I wasn’t fulfilling the role of aiding others to worship because of my pride. I left that Friday night with so much regret from not worshiping all out and for being self-conscious.
The same went for opening worship on Saturday morning, but for the second worship it finally changed. Seeing one of the people who welcomed me into the CFC-Youth community leading worship made me feel joyful for him and being able to serve the Lord at this Conference, as well as seeing our friends rush to the edge of the stage and cheer.
Once we got on-stage for the last worship (Praisefest), the energy was so different. Everyone started jumping around like crazy and we all started getting hyped for what was coming next. 5 songs in a row, I could feel everyone just yelling, shouting, and declaring the Lord’s name. I open my eyes and I see one of the greatest blessings that anyone can encounter: seeing brothers and sisters in Christ worshiping at their greatest capacity. At that moment I felt a glimpse of Heaven. Utter joy and happiness filled and overflowed my heart and my soul. Worshiping the Lord without any care of what to sing or what to play or what I sounded like was like removing something heavy off my shoulders. During the activity for Praisefest, tears were building up in my eyes from watching everyone embrace each other…
Leaving the Chandos Auditorium felt so fulfilling, joyful, and uplifting knowing that this whole Conference was the Lord’s work and not ours. I declare that Jesus Christ is ultimately worthy of love, and that His love is nothing compared to anything you can get from this world. He is our King that took upon the cross of countless sins of His children and that He was and is the ultimate sign of sacrifice and love.
Words will never be able to describe the joy and happiness I felt at this year’s RYC. The journey was full of obstacles and emotional roller coasters but the reward was so, so worth it. Each music ministry practice was a blessing in disguise as was each new person I met these past few weeks. We legitimately acted and felt like a family whenever we were together and it was like we have known each other for so long. Everyone was so derp yet mature. This weekend was ultimately one of the most fulfilling and amazing weekends in my life, but hopefully these experiences won’t stop.
From now on, I declare that He is worthy and He is love. Jesus Christ our Lord and Saviour, our mighty King, the One and Only Messiah, the Most Humble, Most Chaste, and Most Loving of All, I truly love You.
Tim Mallare – South 2 Music Ministry Head | CFC-Youth Pacific Region
